The wedding speeches are a traditional and much-anticipated part of any wedding reception. First comes the father of the bride, then the groom, then the best man, then… it all starts to get a little hazy.
The thing is, there are a number of wedding speeches that need to be made on the big day. Guests can quickly become bored if speeches drag on too long, while short speeches might leave the speakers feeling they haven’t properly honoured the bride or groom. So, how do you find the perfect balance while keeping everyone engaged?
No need to stress! We’ve put together a detailed guide on how long each wedding speech should be, along with tips on what to include to ensure both heartfelt moments and a captivated audience.
A wedding speech is a speech made by members of the wedding party during the wedding reception. There’s a traditional order of speeches that most people usually follow. However, it’s your big day, so you can absolutely shake it up if you want.
The tradition is for wedding speeches to be delivered after the main course but before dessert during the reception. This timing ensures that your guests are well-fed and relaxed, creating a natural pause before they enjoy dessert. However, if you prefer to change it up, you can opt for speeches after dessert or even during the ceremony itself — it’s your day, so you can choose what works best for you!
While it’s possible to schedule speeches before the meal, it’s generally not recommended as guests might be hungry after the ceremony, and distracted by their rumbling stomachs rather than focusing on the heartfelt speeches.
Generally, wedding speeches should last between 5 and 7 minutes to ensure there’s enough time for everyone who wants to speak. The entire “wedding speech” segment of the reception should last no more than 40 minutes to keep your guests engaged, but it usually wraps up within 20 to 30 minutes.
You can adjust the length of each speech to ensure everyone has a fair chance to speak. For instance, if you only have two or three speakers, you can allow for longer speeches. However, if several members of the wedding party wish to say a few words, it’s a good idea to shorten each speech to maintain the flow of the event and stick to the schedule. This way, every speaker gets their moment without overwhelming the guests or dragging out the timeline.
Pro tip: To keep things balanced, divide the total time allotted for speeches by the number of speakers. For instance, if you plan to spend 30 minutes on speeches and have five people speaking, each speech would last around 5.5 minutes, with a 30-second pause in between.
If you’re in a rush, check out the below quick reference guide to see how long your wedding speech should ideally be. Otherwise, read on for the full breakdown, and be sure to save this infographic for future use.
The father of the bride’s speech is traditionally the longest speech in the order of speeches. It’s usually the first speech made during the wedding reception and is a beloved and much-anticipated part of the bride’s big day.
The father of the bride’s speech should typically last between 7 to 9 minutes, and ideally no longer than 12 minutes, to keep the overall flow of speeches smooth and engaging. These speeches generally include heartfelt sentiments, advice, and sometimes a touch of humour, ensuring they honour the bride without taking too long.
The groom’s speech can be a little longer than the best man’s speech. It should last between 6 and 8 minutes, but no longer than 10 for the guests’ sake.
It’s usually second in the order of speeches and should be positioned as a thank-you note to all the people who have supported your relationship and wedding planning. As a basic structure, we recommend the following general structure:
The ideal length for a best man speech is around 5 minutes. However, it can be a little longer or a little shorter, depending on your personal preferences and the overall speech order.
The best man’s speech is usually the third in the order of speeches. It should include things such as:
While not a traditional element, the maid of honour’s speech can be a touching and memorable part of the wedding reception. Like the best man’s speech, it’s best to keep it brief, ideally between 4 and 6 minutes.
The beauty of the maid of honour speech lies in its flexibility — there are no strict expectations, so you can structure it however you’d like. That said, it’s a good idea to include personal anecdotes, well wishes for the couple, and a heartfelt message for the bride.
As with the maid of honour speech, a bridesmaid’s speech is untraditional, so there are no expectations on how long the speech should be or what it should include. We recommend keeping the speech to around 5 minutes long (less if you’d like multiple bridesmaids to make a speech).
Having a bridesmaid’s speech after the maid of honour speech may be nice way to keep things flowing. We suggest that you consider the following structure:
The mother of the groom speech may not be part of traditional wedding speeches, but it’s a beautiful opportunity for a mother to share her love, support, and best wishes for her son and his new spouse. This speech typically lasts between 3 to 5 minutes and, if you’re following traditional speech order, it’s likely to be one of the final speeches at the reception (though this is flexible).
There’s no strict format for a mother of the groom speech, but we recommend including:
Wedding speeches are a cherished and traditional part of the reception, offering a special opportunity for the wedding party and loved ones to express their heartfelt sentiments to the newlyweds.
As mentioned earlier, the ideal length for a speech is around 5 to 7 minutes. This allows enough time for meaningful thank-yous, advice, and stories, while keeping the flow enjoyable and maintaining your guests’ attention.
We’ve got plenty of great tips, tricks, and wedding speech structures to help you get started if you’re unsure about what to include. And, to see how long your wedding speech should be in practice, check out our wedding speech examples.